Hello Ravens,
today begins week number five of this school year, and I bet you're all ready for those warm summer days and long summer nights, but you're just going to have to be a bit more patient. Just face it, there's plenty of school ahead of you and it's not ending any time soon. So you might as well take it as it comes. But there is one thing to look forward to now, and thus the countdown begins. Just thirteen days until the famed event of all high schools: Homecoming. With this event comes the tradition of crowning Homecoming King and Queen, and with some of you that are involved you can no doubt expect this one to be a blood bath.
"Shoot for the stars!" they say, and for this HC Queen candidate, a little motivation like this is exactly what she needed. If you haven't seen her around school, you might recognize her from a little deli down on 119th. But apparently, making sandwiches just isn't satisfying enough, so she set her sights a little higher. HC Queen is an honor that very few in the world posses and there's only a small sum of ways to achieve even the opportunity of gaining such a title. One of them is having the utmost qualities a girl can have, thus being nominated by your adoring comrades. Another is making it known that you're interested, having enough influence will make sure you're not a second thought. But the most devilishly juicy of all is bribery. And our Raven lady chose option C.
For most people the first thing a bribe makes you think of is money, but there are plenty of ways to insure someone's support, and though she may not have been able to get the ladies on her side she knew the gentlemen would be ripe for the picking. You may have seen it, you may have not, but floating around the digital world of ONW is a dirty little picture of our candidate, and because of which, she and her boyfriend are given the chance of a lifetime. Fortunately the rest of us have our own form of insurance in the way of extortion. Now many of your fellow classmates are in possession of something that could ruin you for the rest of your life. I hope you don't set your sights on becoming President, because that went out the window right along with your reputation. Congratulations, you go down in Raven history.
I have plenty more to dish up on HC scandals but this post is already too long for you non-morning people on a Monday, so I'll hold off for now. Until then, get your homework done, get your attire picked out and your plans for HC week set, because you're running out of time. Now, I give my one and only good-luck wish to the candidates and hope you come up with more stupid ways to try and insure your winnings, don't disappoint me.
Yours truly, O.A.
